Living to old age is an accomplishment. It’s reflective of a life well-lived and knowledge gained. Hopefully, as we age, we can create great stories in this journey we call life. This episode was hosted by Kim Shine & Joel Dresang, edited by Sam Woods and includes four stories based on the theme of “Seniors” from Barbara Leigh, Erin Whitney, Shawn Mitchell and Evelyn Prevenas.
Episode transcript below from Ex Fabula's Real Storie MKE series.
Kim Shine: Welcome to Real Stories MKE, brought to you by Ex Fabula as part of its mission to connect Milwaukee through real stories. I'm Kim Shine.
Joel Dresang: And I'm Joel Dresang. Ex Fabula believes that everyone has personal stories worth sharing. Conducts storytelling workshops where community members can build storytelling skills and confidence. And Ex Fabula hosts StorySlams so people can share their true stories on stage. Today, we're bringing you four of those amazing stories.
Kim Shine: That is right. And this season of Real Stories MKE is presented by Christine Symchych and Jim McNulty. Thank you. And the theme for this episode is “Seniors.” To be senior in anything means that you've lived and you've learned and you survived. And hopefully, you'll have some good stories to share from along the way. In this episode, we're showing some respect to our elders and for listening to the wisdom that only comes with time.
So, Joel, our first story comes from Barbara Leigh. Barbara told this tale in January of 2025 at an Ex Fabula StorySlam with the theme of “Found Family.”
Barbara Leigh: The last place I thought I would ever want to live was an old person's home. But my. I have a spinal cord injury and partly paralyzed. My partner Ricky has Parkinson's, and we were living on the second floor of his condo. And when he fell down the steps and almost hit his head, I thought, we need another place to live.
So, we started looking around. I'd always live downtown. I love downtown, so we started in this neighborhood, and we found this place that had huge windows and balconies, and I saw the test possibilities. But it's a retirement home, I don't know. So we thought, well, we'll just check it out. So we made an appointment. We came in the door and it was happened to be happy hour and five different people knew me and said, Barbara, you have to come live with us.
Oh, this is not what I expected. And gradually we decided that, yes, it would try this out. We found a place in the corner. It had ginormous windows and light all the time. Light is what I crave. And we found out that the people in this building are so activist and actually managed to develop their own programs. And so I was like, could I do a monthly story sharing?
Uh, like Ex Fabula. So it's been a wonderful thing because every so well, once a month, people share their life stories about indep—well, there are themes that kind of like...like this last time, we kind of morphed off of Ex Fabula, and it was unexpected connections instead of non-connections, which turned out to be really wonderful. Well, I never knew quite how much new family meant to me until this last Saturday.
And I'm used to going to rallies, you know, like, I used to always. I'm part of a theater company. We used to do big parades. I wanted to do this rally that was going to be for freedoms, all of our freedoms. So I set out on my scooter until I thought I was bundled up. And if we got to the city hall and I kept looking at the little barometer that was on my scooter, and I kept going into the red, and I'm like, I don't think this looks good.
And then my hands are really cold and I didn't think my fingers are going to last. So, a woman from a choir, I joined the choir at the Unitarian church. Made a lot of friends there. So she gave me some mittens. And then I was like, I don't know, it's not quite it. And then somebody else came up to me and said, Barbara, are you okay?
And I was like, well, my scooter doesn't seem to like the cold. I'm not...my scooter is not okay. And so she said, well, we'll have to get you a car. And so, yeah, that would be a good idea. So lo and behold, she scouts the crowd. She finds a man from our choir who has a car, just happens to have a car nearby, and he brings his car over.
We disengage my scooter. He switched it up to the car. I managed to get in, and then he and another friend had managed to have my scooter to the back of his car and take me home. And on my way home I'm realizing I don't have the FOB for getting into St. Rita’s. How am I going to get in?
So I decided I better call my partner so I—I couldn't see because I didn't have my glasses on. So, I thought it was his number. I pressed the number, and some voice answers. And I said, who is is? “This is Dwight.” Dwight was one of my best friends at St. Rita’s. Dwight's the guy who fixes my wheelchair, fixes everything for everybody, and I explained my quandary and he said, well, I'm not there right now, but I'll be there in five minutes, so I should be okay.
So, I get there. There is Dwight. He and Mark get my wheelchair, my scooter out of the car, get me into it, got me into St. Rita’s. Dwight pushes my scooter all the way up to my apartment, and I am realizing I am here with my found family. Thank you.
Kim Shine: That was Barbara Leigh. We have an update from her, Barbara says “I realized after I told this story that my found family embraces friends at Saint Rita Square and friends at the Unitarian Church. We were all at the march together supporting women, immigrants and all those who are being marginalized, and it made me feel like we are all part of our found family. It was a beautiful experience.”
Joel Dresang: Our next story comes from Erin Whitney. During a service learning project at the University of Wisconsin-Milwaukee, Erin found that friendship can come at any age, especially when you're doing something you've never done. She told this story in 2017 at Building Bridges for a Better Milwaukee. That was a StorySlam presented in partnership with UW-Milwaukee's Service Learning department. Here’s Erin.
Erin Whitney: Hi. So, I'm Erin Whitney. I'm about to graduate with Community Arts and I am living currently in a senior living community, High Point, as a student artist in residence. So in exchange for workshops and creative opportunities, I'm given housing and a very expanded social circle. So we're, one of the women that I've met in the social circle that's much expanded.
She is a writer, a poet, a really creative person, an extremely witty woman with like some of the best pieces of advice I've ever heard, such as it's fun to play and try new things because there's a good chance you probably haven't done it before. So Enid and I, we, I had a play that I had to go to for school, and I needed a date.
So, I called Enid, of course, and we decided on Sunday at 1:20 to meet up so we could go to Colectivo beforehand so we can get coffee, biscotti, the whole thing that you do before a play. When we got to Colectivo, you know, I found out she hadn't been to a coffee shop in like ten years. And I was just bewildered with this.
And we sat down at the big, long shared table that Colectivo has. And right away, before, even like the first sip happened, Enid leans over to the...our neighbor table, girl on the right and she's like, what are you doing?
Right off the bat, this girl was like a little startled, like, my architecture project. And within moments we had like six people taking off their headphones, shutting their screens. And like, this conversation, communication was happening naturally how it's supposed to. And it was just so exciting. We were late for the play. That's okay, that's okay. It was a great performance.
But during intermission, when the lights came on, Enid did the same thing and eventually it was, well, isn't that character ridiculous? And again, everyone around us was like, yeah, talking about the play and these things that probably wouldn't have happened for at the end of the play, I introduced Enid to my instructor for my, my class. And they talked a little bit.
They're both writers. They're both interested in theater. We got in the car later and...”He has nice eyes.” Oh yeah, Enid.. Sure, sure. But so I wanted to do more with Enid. I was like having this moment of like, should we go grocery shopping? Like, I'm not ready to go back to High Point right now. And eventually we decided to go to Black Cat Alley.
It's just like a little mural alley on the east side of Milwaukee. We decide to walk down and we're looking at all this art, and she's giving me this commentary, and I'm experiencing this art in a different way that I probably haven't seen it before with my friends. And we're seeing all these people taking like, selfies and these couples together.
And I'm like, Enid, would you like to take some photos in front of the murals? And she's like, oh yeah, sure, sure. We took two photos before she was like, well, now we have to take one together. I'm like, okay, Enid, sure. And I get ready to take a photo in front of the mural and she's like, no, let's make ours different.
She points over to the dumpster on the right side. It's like, let's take ours in front of the dumpsters that are like blocking the alley. I'm like, yes, Enid, that would be fantastic. So I have a photo of Enid, and I, two goons in front of a dumpster, and it is one of my favorite photos because it's the whole day all together.
And it it's a funny photo, first of all, but it means a lot to me. But I guess for the whole of the story is that these these relationship that are built when you get yourself into the community and you build these little bridges that may help you cross like differences, like age or like cultural backgrounds, you can meet people like Enid.
So that's Enid. Yeah.
Joel Dresang: That was Erin Whitney.
Kim Shine: Our third story comes from Shawn Mitchell. Back in July of 2023, Shawn shared memories of his grandparents, and at the end, offered some sage advice from his grandfather. And I must warn you guys, though, the story ends with a funny twist. Shawn, to this day, all during AfterDark: For the Culture, a collaboration between Ex Fabula and HYFIN, a Radio Milwaukee station.
Shawn Mitchell: You know, for me, my Papa was my hero. He still is my hero. And for those of you not familiar with African American culture, Papa is my grandfather. So my grandfather and my grandmother, they set in motion a culture in my family, a culture of love and honor and respect, motherhood and fatherhood and most of all, service to family and those in need.
My grandfather was my hero most of all, because after my father abandoned my mother, my sister and I, he became that male energy that I needed to have around me at such a young age to grow into a proper man. My grandfather was really wonderful at being there and being in those spaces that I needed him to be in my father.
To this day, I we have no relationship. I don't know him, but I'm 53 years old, and the last time I may have talked to him, was when I was probably about three. So my grandfather, my whole life has been the man I've imitated. He was, you know, he was in the Navy. He joined the Navy at 26 and he joined the Navy to care for his then four children.
Him and my grandmother had married early. He was 18, she was 15, and they lived a life, they had seen too much as young people. So they wanted to get together and live their life together. And they did that. They raised five children... or eight children, excuse me. Five sons, three daughters. Right. And he made time for me as his grandson, knowing that my father was not involved.
My cousin as well was going through the same situation. Unfortunately, for our culture at that time, deadbeat dads were everywhere. And it didn't matter what color you were, it was just a scene of your time. But my grandfather stood, and he would take me to the zoo. And it was the first time I'd ever been to the zoo.
It's a vivid memory of him walking me to every single cage, telling me about the animals, where they were from and what they like to eat and everything else. You know, later on I would figure out he was reading it off the thing, but that's as a four year old. He was my—he was just everything for me.
So, fast forward, I'm 17. I joined the Navy because my grandfather was a Navy man. I joined the Navy. I get into boot camp and I figure out, well, I signed up for something. It was probably one of the most difficult things I ever do in my life. And I graduated, so when I graduated, I. And every, every, every Friday at Great Lakes Naval Recruit Center, there's a graduation, okay, that's down in Illinois.
And you can invite people, but you never know who's going to come, right? So you're there and there's this part where we all march past the the, you know, the stands where all the people are. And you get it. You get a hope. You hope you get a chance to see somebody, your family or something, you know, your mother yelling and all of that.
So as we... as you make the pass, I see my...I see my grandfather.
Unexpectedly. And this is a nearly ten minute procession as we go down and he's 70 and he’s standing at attention and he's saluting the whole time. And he and my grandma, he he's my grandmother really, really set forth this culture of family and service and and being there for each other. My aunt could call from Milwaukee, eight hours away from Saint Louis, and tell my grandfather that her car was broke and he would be there.
He would pack up the van and whoever wanted to come, they would come ane next think you know, here was Papa in Saint Louis, right? Or in Milwaukee, fixing cars, you know, telling us everything. He set the he set the bar for my manhood. Because at the at the young age, you with your mother and your sister all the time.
Right. And you don't get to do nothing. They corrected you every time. You can't say bad words. You can't say a word out of the way. You can't say ain't. You can't say nothing. So me and my cousin would go to my grandfather's house and watch him work on his car. This this one time that released me from all that other stuff and let me know that I too, was a man, was that I farted.
I farted and he said the famous 12 words: “It is better to fart in shame than in vein.” Thank you.
Kim Shine: That was Shawn Mitchell.
Joel Dresang: UltraShorts?
Kim Shine: Yeah, I'd like to do some.
Joel Dresang: Okay, so UltraShorts are short, little stories that people write down. And our hosts read them at our events.
Kim Shine: Yeah. This one here is from anonymous. “I played in a band with a clarinet player named Joe who was still playing, and well into his 90s. After a gig, a woman came up to him and said, I love your playing. May I give you a hug? He was 93. He said, yes. And then in his gruff old man voice said, Where were you when I had my strength?”
Joel Dresang: Here's an UltraShort from anonymous. “I was once in a bar in downtown Portland. Everyone was 25 to 35. An older man, probably in his 80s, asked me to dance. I agreed. Afterwards, he said, Thanks. People just need to be seen sometimes.”
Kim Shine: Oh, that's sweet.
Joel Dresang: Our final senior story comes from the fearless Evelyn Prevenas. After seeing one of her children skydive, she decided to try it herself. But that's nowhere near this story's end. Evelyn shared this memory during a 2012 Ex Fabula StorySlam with the theme “Game On.” Here's Evelyn.
Evelyn Prevenas: When does a dream begin? For me, it began 20 years ago when my son Tony told us that he was going to do a parachute jump. Would we like to go along? So, of course, we all followed him to Omro, to this tiny, little airfield. He did his jump and while we were there, I saw a larger chute coming down with two people on it.
A tandem jump that was very intriguing. Well, 12 years passed and then the same son told us that he was going to do a tandem skydive with several of his friends. So of course, we all followed him down to Omro again.
And we saw him get ready and go up on this little plane. Now in a tandem skydive, the plane goes up to 10,000ft, compared to 5,000 for a regular parachute jump. And after they exit the plane, there is a free fall for 5,000ft, and then the chute opens. Well, we watched this little plane go higher and higher and higher in the sky.
Barely see it up there on the clouds. And then for an instant they cut the engine and there's this little black speck coming down. And if you blink for a second, you lose sight of it. And then that chute opens and he comes floating down to the ground. And when I saw the expression on his face when he came to the ground, I decided then and there, I'm going to do this.
So, the following fall, there were seven family members that decided to go skydiving. Myself, three sons, two daughter in laws, and a grandson. The day dawned, but we didn't see the sun that morning. It was so foggy as we drove to Omro. We could barely see the car ahead of us, and all the way there we were wondering, will we be able to jump?
Will we even arrive safely? Well, when we got there, they told us that the weather prediction was that it would clear by noon. But, you know, Wisconsin weather. Well, so we hung around and visited with the tandem masters and watched the Weather Channel on the television. Well, true to the forecast, it did clear by noon and our jump was going to be a go.
Well, we had already received instructions on what to do when we go up on the plane and what to do when we exit the plane. You have to arch your back, arms out, legs extend up behind. So anyway, we get all suited up with the jumpsuit and then they put the harness on you. First you have to step in with one leg, then the other leg, then up over the shoulders.
And they tighten up all these buckles and straps and tighten them up some more. And then they grab you by the shoulders on the harness and pull it up, just to make sure that you're securely in the harness, they hand you a pair of goggles and off you go to the plane. Now the plane is just a little Cessna four seater and they've taken all the seats out except the pilot's seat.
So, you have to sit on the floor of the plane. The plane takes off and you're trying to look out the window, but I could barely reach because I'm short. And so you get a little glimpse of clouds going by and maybe a glimpse of the ground as the plane might bank a little. You go higher and higher.
At about 7000ft, the tandem master shows you the altimeter or the altitude on his wrist. go up higher. Then he shows it to you: 8,000ft. Then 9,000ft. Then he asks you, are you ready to go? Well, if you're going to chickened out, you better do it now. But I can’t chickened out. My children have chipped in and paid for my jump.
And they're so proud of mom for doing this. So I guess I'm going to go. So the tandem master tightens up this harness even tighter than it is already. Then you turn around and you're hooked up to him. You're back to his front, about as close as you can get to any other human being. Your inch your way over to the door of the plane, and you're desperately trying to remember the instructions they gave you on the ground.
Then they open the door and that wind is roaring by, and you look down and there is the ground. It is so far away it's just a blur. It's almost meaningless. It doesn't mean anything to you. And as you inched closer to the door, instinctively, you want to grab up and hold onto the side of that door. But no, no, no, you can't do that.
You have to hold your harness right here. So the tandem master puts off his right foot on that little tiny platform out there, and you put your right foot out. And it really is hard getting it out there because of the wind. And then your left foot. Okay, tuck your head and you tumble over. And for a brief second you see that plane above.
You turn over again, arch your back, arch your back. Okay, I arched my back, got my feet up behind me, then the tandem master taps you on the arm. What? What? Oh, the arms, the arms. So here you are, hurtling through the air, 120 miles an hour. 5,000ft. And you are yelling as loud as you can, but you can't hear it.
You can only feel the vibrations in your head. And you think this jump, this 15 seconds is going to go on forever.
And then all of a sudden there's this jerk. And the chute opens. And in those brief seconds, you're going from utter terror to complete calm. And you look up and there is that beautiful orange and red canopy above you, like an upside down cradle, bringing you safely down to the earth. And now look around. You've got this 360 degree view of this beautiful, wonderful world we live in.
You look down and there are the cornfields, golden in the sunlight. And there's this road going by with the little tiny cars. And as you turn the chute, there's Lake Butte de Mor. And the Fox River, Lake Winnebago. Other tandem masters have told me that on a really clear day, you can see all the way to Lake Michigan or to Milwaukee.
And here you are, drifting down just like a bird on a circle. Down, down, down they go. You wish it would last forever, but eventually you come closer to the ground and there's your family waving and yelling your name, taking your picture. And as you get closer and closer to the ground, you lift up your legs and you slide into the ground on the tandem master's lap.
He unhooks you, you get up and there's hugs and high fives all around. Excuse me. And then your family comes rushing over to take your picture. And I get such a feeling of exhilaration, such a high. Nothing like you'd ever get with drugs or alcohol. And for me, that feeling lasts at least a week or even longer. All I have to do is go outside and look up at the sky and it all comes rushing back.
Well, I jumped six more times after that.
And I've also taken seniors from the senior center skydiving, ranging in age from 65 to 83. And last year we even took the mayor of Sheboygan along. And not the one that was in all the headlines. If you have a dream large or small, if it's something scary like skydiving or challenging, maybe like running a marathon, step out of your comfort zone.
Take the leap. You'll never regret it. Thank you.
Joel Dresang: That was Evelyn Prevenas
Kim Shine: I really like the stories in this episode, and I feel inspired.
Joel Dresang: Yes!
Kim Shine: I feel inspired to live till I'm 150 years old.
Joel Dresang: It's one day at a time.
Kim Shine: I know, haha!
Kim Shine: Well, that's all the time we have for this episode of Real Stories MKE. But Ex Fabula has more stories to share. It's been hosting Slam since 2009 and has audio and video stories at exfabula.org
Joel Dresang: And more stories are on their way. The Ex Fabula website lists upcoming storytelling workshops and StorySlams so you can join in on the storytelling. You can also connect with Ex Fabula on Facebook, Instagram, and TikTok, and subscribe to Real Stories MKE wherever you find podcasts.
Kim Shine: So thanks to everyone who makes this program possible, including Ex Fabula staff, the storytellers, our producer, Jordan Terry and our fabulous audio engineer, Sam Woods. And thanks as well to the many funders of Ex Fabula programs, including the Mike Hagen Foundation, the Bert L. and Patricia Stagg Letter Charitable Trust, and Ex Fabula members.
Joel Dresang: For Real Stories MKE, I’m Joel Dresang.
Kim Shine: And I am Kim Shine. Remember, everybody has stories worth sharing, so please consider telling yours.
