Dance is the art of movement, expression in one of its freest forms.When you dance, you're connecting with yourself and the people around you. This episode of Real Stories MKE features stories about dance from Dionysia, the Unshaven Haven of Burlesque, Dave Hendrickson, and Tejumola Ologboni. Real Stories MKE is hosted by Kim Shine and Joel Dresang with support from producer Jasmine Gonzalez and audio engineer Sam Woods.
Episode transcript below from Ex Fabula's Real Storie MKE series.
Kim Shine: We're back. Hey everybody. Welcome to another fabulous edition of Real Stories MKE, brought to you as part of Ex Fabula's mission to connect Milwaukee through real stories. This right here is season seven, and I'm Kim Shine.
Joel Dresang: And I'm Joel Dresang. Ex Fabula believes that everybody has personal stories worth sharing. It runs workshops to help community members build storytelling skills and confidence. And Ex Fabula hosts StorySlams, where people tell their true stories on stage. In this episode of Real Stories MKE, we're sharing three of those memorable stories.
Kim Shine: Ooh, yeah. And our theme this episode is Dance.
Joel Dresang: Tap your toes.
Kim Shine: Yeah. It is the art of movement, expression in one of its freest forms. So, when you dance, you're connecting with yourself and the music and other people who are around, if they are around, because you could just be dancing and watching yourself, which is fantastic.
Joel Dresang: Oh, sure, that's fine, yeah. And we were talking about this. I mean, you like music, you like movement,
Kim Shine: Yeah, if I don't have it, at least, you know, once a week, I'm sad.
Joel Dresang: Yeah. When I was in high school, we I was with a group of friends at high school dances. We went crazy. We did all sorts. We, we would do demolition polka dancing, where we would grab a partner and we would dance the polka and try to knock over other couples. We just were nuts. So, but then, go forward a few years, I'm in college, and one of my best friends was a dance major.
Kim Shine: Okay.
Joel Dresang: So, I went to a house party where there were all these dance students, and I'd seen them perform, and they were great, and that just felt really intimidated.
Kim Shine: No!
Joel Dresang: Yeah, and the music came on, but it just so happened that a friend of mine from high school was there and we caught eyes, and the spark was there, and we just started getting crazy. Yeah, and the dance students came up to us and said, "You guys are so fun!" And that's what it was. It was just getting rid of those inhibitions and having fun.
Kim Shine: Yeah, I think once you do that, you can just be free and you don't care, right? Because you're just being you.
Joel Dresang: You shouldn't. Yes.
Kim Shine: Well, our first dance story comes from Dionysia, the Unshaven Haven of Burlesque. Now she found this passion and personal autonomy in the sensual style of Burlesque. That's the story that she shared in March of 2025 at The EXperience: Bodies StorySlam. Here's Dionysia.
Dionysia: Thank you, hello and thank you, JJ, for having me tonight. My name is Dionysia and I am the Unshaven Haven of Burlesque. Burlesque, in its modern sense, is defined as the art of the striptease. It combines dance, comedy and musical theater to create truly unique performance arts, preserving the vintage esthetics old Hollywood glamor and the classic showgirl looks.
Dionysia: I'll always remember the very first burlesque show I ever saw in Kenosha, where I'm from, KTown Burlesque, and just how enthralled I was with it. I used to be in musical theater growing up and seeing the show was completely different than what I was expecting. It was a variety of performances, singers and acrobats, different costumes, different characters. But what most stuck out to me is I could tell that each and every performer put their whole soul into their performance. You could just tell that each performer was really passionate about what they had brought to the stage.
In retrospect, I recognize now this is because the art of burlesque is rooted in the principle of autonomy, meaning you are always in control of what you bring to the stage. You're in control of what you wear, how you look, how you dance, how you move, what characters you show up as, what scenery you have, what skills you show off. And ultimately, you're in control of what you reveal and what you don't reveal. When I first saw my first show, you know, I immediately fell in love, and I was like, okay, this is it. This is what I need to do. But are they going to accept me if I show up, as a woman, hairy? Took me six months to get myself into classes and onto the stage, just from the fear of it.
Growing up, I had heard a lot of stereotypes, a lot of negative comments about Latinas and what it meant to show up as a Latina here in southeast Wisconsin. I'd heard whisperings and negative comments on social media in the media and whisperings from friends about Latinas being hairy, about Latinas having mustaches and all of this, to the point that I would internalize it if I wasn't completely, you know, silky smooth. I would, you know, hold myself back from the pool parties. I wouldn't go out to the beach, you know, I would say I'm so sorry, like I forgot my swimsuit, and I really didn't like that feeling that at one point, seven years ago, I said, eff it. I'm just gonna commit to it, and I'm gonna be hairy. And so, I was!
And, you know, it took me six months, but I was like, okay, well, let me see. Let me try. You know, I see that burlesque performers are glamorous and beautiful and opulent, and you know this look, but are they going to accept me if I show up completely unshaven? And I am proud to announce three years now into the future, I am a professional burlesque performer, and I travel around. I bring my performances, I teach classes, I public speak now, shout out JJ, as a hairy Latina.
I use my platform to spread the message that you can show up how you want in the world, and it's always up to you, whether you shave, whether you don't, whether you wear certain clothes or you don't, you are always in control of you and your body and how you present yourself.
I use my platform to spread the message that burlesque has... the main tenets of burlesque are that you're always in control of yourself, that there is body autonomy as to how you show up and how you move and how you express yourself in your day to day. So if you go out into the world and you say, hey, I heard this burlesque performer at this event, or, you know, I've heard about burlesque, you know, I hope you're able to share with your people that you know that, yes, burlesque is about the sexiness and the striptease, but that it's also this art form that's rooted in self-autonomy, and that spreads the message that all bodies are burlesque bodies, and that you are always in control of what you do with yourself and your body.
So, if you'd like to learn more about burlesque, come say hi, find me on social media, stop shaving, nah I'm just kidding, and come out to a show. Thank you, guys, for having me.
Kim Shine: That was Dionysia, the Unshaven Haven of Burlesque, and we do have an update from her. She says, I'm currently in the process of forming my own burlesque production company here in Wisconsin. I'm still leading the Wisconsin Burlesque Collaborative, a group of Wisconsin burlesque performers preserving and promoting diverse and queer burlesque in the state. I still have not shaven my body hair, but I recently got a haircut. That's great.
Joel Dresang: Kim, do you want to do some UltraShorts?
Kim Shine: I would love to do some UltraShorts.
Joel Dresang: Well, let's remind everybody, since it's the first episode of season seven, what UltraShorts are?
Kim Shine: Yeah, UltraShorts are basically small, maybe 30 seconds or so, stories that people who don't go on stage but still want to be part of the action, they can write and the host will read.
Joel Dresang: They're stories, but they're ultra short.
Kim Shine: Yes.
Joel Dresang: Yes, I've got one right here. It's from anonymous. "My body is a love story that is still being unwritten through dance, yoga and late-night naked walks to the fridge."
Kim Shine: I'm here for that. This one here is from Shelly: "After being married 23 years, I got divorced, and I desperately started looking for my tribe. I needed to dance to find my soul again. I searched for months and finally found Mad Planet. Six years later, I dance every weekend with my found dance family."
Joel Dresang: And you found Mad Planet recently, right yourself?
Kim Shine: I did! And I really think I'm gonna go back.
Joel Dresang: Great.
Kim Shine: I like the space.
Joel Dresang: Good deal. I have an UltraShort from Laura: "I asked my boyfriend to dance at the eighth-grade formal. He told me, Jesus didn't want us to. I went to the bathroom and spent the rest of the night trading lip gloss."
Kim Shine: This here's from anonymous: "I started Irish dancing when I was in second grade, when my team did a dance at one of our first competitions, we got so turned around on the stage that we ended up facing backstage and bowed with our butts to the audience."
Joel Dresang: Nice.
Kim Shine: I like that one.
Joel Dresang: Our next dance story is from Dave Hendrickson. He asked the universe for a dance partner and realized an important rule in getting your wishes granted. Here's Dave:
Dave Hendrickson: When I was in my mid 30s, Hooligans on North Avenue was a crowded, rowdy, smoky saloon. I used to go down there quite often on Monday nights, because that's when they had live blues. I'd drink a few beers and repeatedly failed to meet someone. For you know, a serious relationship.
Oh, I went to other bars on other nights, and I didn't meet anyone. I took classes, among them, a meditation course where we were told that the more you meditate, the more favorable coincidences will occur in your life. I didn't meet anyone in there either. However, one time I did get a free pizza. And the other thing, another thing that I learned there was that if you had a problem with anything at all, you could simply ask the universe for help. And that gave me an idea.
The next Monday that I was in Hooligans, standing there, it was crowded as usual, I'm standing there by the edge of the tiny dance floor, and I went into a meditation right on that spot. And then when it felt like the time was right, it was ten minutes to 11, I remember, I spoke to the universe:
"Excuse me. Sorry to bother you. I know you're probably busy, but you know, being the universe and all, you probably have to keep those planets moving around, paying attention to the whole galaxy. But if it's not too much trouble, could you provide me with a dance partner? Thank you. Well, I've been told in the class that when you speak to the universe, you should be specific and confident. Since I have to work tomorrow, and she'll probably have to work tomorrow, and we might want to go over to Ma Fischer's for a cup of coffee afterwards, I'd like this to happen by 11 o'clock. Oh, and thanks for the free pizza."
So, I keep on with my meditation, and I feel like the time is slipping away here, waiting patiently for my dance partner to appear. So, I take a sneaky look around the room, because you don't want the universe to notice that you might be having doubts. Well, it was two minutes to 11, no candidates in sight. I was having doubts, but I kept meditating, feeling kind of, you know, stupid. And then, much to my surprise, at that point, a female voice whispers in my ear, "Hi, remember me?"
I open my eyes. It's two minutes after 11, close enough. I hesitate, because I don't remember her. She says, "Oh, come on, you gotta remember! You were wearing a tuxedo." Well, I'd only worn a tuxedo once in my life when I stood up at my friend's wedding and I'd gotten pretty drunk. Could I have met her and forgotten, or did she think I was somebody else? Who cares? She's pretty.
I asked her to dance, and this was her reply: "Only if it's slow, and only if you hold me close."
And the band, as if on cue, transitions from upbeat to a slow and sexy blues. I take her in my arms. I hold her close. We dance. This is magical. If I'm the wrong guy, the guy she thinks I am, must have some fond memories. I wonder what she's thinking. Hope she doesn't want to have children. I could fake it and pretend I remember her. Yeah, that would work. No, that probably wouldn't work. She'd probably catch on. It looks like all I've got to go on is the truth.
Song ends, I began to tell her about the tuxedo and that I don't remember her, because at that wedding I got very drunk, very, very drunk. But, and that's as far as I get, she never takes her eyes off me as she backs away and out the side door. The band picks up the tempo as if to erase the memory of that slow, sexy blues. Whether I was the wrong guy or the fool who couldn't remember, makes no difference. I feel sorry for both of us.
Wait a minute. She could be outside waiting for a bus. I could go out there and tell her the whole truth about the meditation, about speaking to the universe, about how this coincidence brought us together, and that must mean something, if there's any sense to this life at all. Take her over to Ma Fischer's, drink coffee, talk all night long.
I go outside; she's gone. As the door closes behind me, the music becomes muffled, distant, as though the band is far away, and they might as well be, because I'm not part of that scene anymore. The magic is over.
As I start walking towards home, it occurs to me that I can't be too serious about a relationship that lasted less than 10 minutes. I hope I was the wrong guy, and she found the guy she was looking for.
And then, it occurs to me that I have been privileged to see a crack in the cosmic egg, an exception to the rules of so-called reality. Reality is a lot bigger than we might realize, and I can't help but laugh about that awareness. I speak to the universe one more time that night: "Next time, I'm asking for more than just a dance." Thank you.
Joel Dresang: That was Dave Hendrickson, you know, I thought about it. And the 10 minutes that he had with this, you know, special dance partner—
Kim Shine: Yeah.
Joel Dresang: —he took 10 minutes to tell the story about that time that he had. So, um. So, he got his money's worth out of that.
Kim Shine: And we got a good story out of that, honestly.
Joel Dresang: Yes, exactly, you know, and that that reminds me of something that I've learned through Ex Fabula, is that if things don't turn out the way you expect, make a story out of it. Yeah, those are the best stories.
Kim Shine: I love that. Our final dance story comes from Tejumola Ologboni, who learned that sometimes dancing and laughing with children is all the healing you might need. He shared this story in April 2014 at a slam with the theme Fool Proof. Here's Tejumola.
Tejumola Ologboni: It was one of those days, you know, I was mad, disgusted, frustrated, depressed. See, I had moved to New York to be a musician, and when I was in New York to be a musician, two of my three drums got stolen. I only had one drum, so I couldn't play with the famous musician I'd gone there to play with. You had to have a full set.
Somebody said, "Well, go play with this African guy." So, I went and played with him, and it was not really satisfying, but we argued all the time. We didn't get along. So, he fired me. The only thing about it was that the building that I lived in was the one that he owned, so he kicked me out of that. I'm telling you, man.
So, I had my drum on my shoulder because when I picked the drum up to leave the strap on, the case broke, and I had to carry it. And I was carrying it like this, and that was so I put it on my shoulder like I'm walking down the street, and I almost walk into a guy, and he says, "Are you a musician?"
And I say, "Yeah, yeah, man, for what it's worth."
He said, "This is my flute. I'm going to the park to play for the children, because that's all that I have left to give." I'm like, whoa, yeah, okay.
He said, "Do you know what probability is?"
And I said, "Well, yeah, see, it's like, whether something is, you know, maybe gonna happen."
He said, "Probability." He said, "Then tell me, what's the probability of me sitting in my living room, cleaning my gun, and the gun goes off accidentally? What's the probability of that bullet going through the wall of my living room and then going through the wall of my living room, into my bedroom, and through the wall of my bedroom and into the bathroom, and into the bathroom, and hitting my wife right between the eyes," he said.
I said, "Well, man, that's really—"
He said, "That's what happened. That's what happened." He said, "We had moved to Alaska to work, to save money so we could come back here to New York to build a life. And that's what happened. She was my everything. Now. All I have left to give is this music. I'm going to the park with my flute to play for the children. You know what cancer is?"
Now I started to say, well, it's a retrovirus. It involves with recombinant DNA. But I know. I said, well, what is cancer?
He said, "Cancer is when one cell decides it doesn't want to be like anybody else. It wants to be different. It wants to be unique. It wants to do its own thing. So, it starts doing its own thing. And the danger, the danger is, not just that that cell is dangerous, but what makes it so deadly is that it positions itself beside a healthy cell and convinces that cell to do its own thing. And the next thing you know, they're doing their own thing. They no longer want to serve the purpose for which they were brought into being. And the next thing you know, they convince other cells to do their own thing. And the next thing you know, they convincing other cells to do their own thing. And you know what they fail to recognize?"
And I'm like, what?
"They fail to recognize they are destroying the very thing that they depend upon for life. They don't want to help nobody. They want to do their own thing. So, all I have left to give is this music. Come on."
So, I picked my drum back up and I followed him to the park. When he got there, he opened up his case, and he took out his flute, and he started playing, and all the kids just gathered around him. So, I took my drum out and I started playing it, and then the children started dancing. And then he, he started dancing, whoa. And then then we were all laughing, you know?
So, the next time that you have one them days where, you know, everything just ain't working for you, you feeling mad and disgusted and frustrated and depressed, go somewhere where there's children and dance with them, and a little while, you'll be laughing. It's foolproof.
Kim Shine: That was Tejumola Ologboni.
Joel Dresang: Hey, Kim, how about some more UltraShorts?
Kim Shine: I'm here for that.
Joel Dresang: I have one from Molly: "I thought my coworker was a total meathead, so I rarely spoke to him. One day, I asked him what he did the night before, and he said he watched a ballet on PBS with his daughter. He said it was beautiful. I'm a jerk."
Kim Shine: Aww. This here is from anonymous: "First love, middle school romance sixth grade in Mr. Gooding's class, my first love and I talked and flirted for months. Life was wonderful until he asked me to dance. Awkwardness ensued, and things were never the same. But, it was good while it lasted."
Joel Dresang: Nice.
Kim Shine: Well, everybody, this is the first part of season seven, and we're so happy to be with you guys. But this right here is all the time that we have for Real Stories MKE, but don't worry! Ex Fabula has been at this since 2009 and there are so many more audio stories available at exfabula.org/radio
Joel Dresang: The Ex Fabula website lists upcoming storytelling workshops and StorySlams, and we hope to see you at an event and maybe even hear your story. You can also connect with Ex Fabula on Facebook and Instagram, and you can keep up with Real Stories MKE wherever you get podcasts.
Kim Shine: Yeah, that's a new website exfabula.org/radio.
Joel Dresang: Mark it.
Kim Shine: Yes, gotta bookmark that. Thanks to everyone who makes this program possible, including Ex Fabula's staff and storytellers, Ex Fabula's season sponsors who include Transfer Pizzeria Cafe, Wisconsin Public Radio 90.7 FM, and WUWM 89.7 FM—
Joel Dresang: —Milwaukee's NPR.
Kim Shine: That's right. We also want to thank producer Jasmine Gonzalez and audio engineer Sam Woods.
Joel Dresang: For Real Stories MKE, I'm Joel Dresang.
Kim Shine: And I'm Kim Shine. Thank you so much for listening. Keep telling your stories.
