Caring, the act ofshowing up for others and letting them knowthey’reseen, isone of the most impactful things we can do for someone.This episode of Real Stories MKE features storiesfromIsaiah RazielFurquan,Mary Krawczyk,LindaNwumeh, andWeston Maier.Real Stories MKE is hosted by Kim Shine and JoelDresangwith support from producer Jasmine Gonzalez and audio engineer Sam Woods.
Episode transcript below from Ex Fabula's Real Stories MKE series.
Joel Dresang
Welcome to Real Stories MKE, brought to you as part of Ex Fabula's mission to connect Milwaukee through real stories. I'm Joel Dresang.
Kim Shine
And I'm Kim Shine. Ex Fabula believes that everybody has personal stories worth sharing, so they run storytelling workshops to help people build their skills and their confidence. And Ex Fabula also holds StorySlams, where folks tell their true personal tales on stage. In this episode of Real Stories MKE, we are sharing four of those remarkable stories.
Joel Dresang
That's right. Our theme this episode is Caring. It's one of the most impactful things we can do for someone. It often involves sacrifice, but sometimes it's as simple as just showing up and letting someone feel seen and heard.
Kim Shine
That's important.
Joel Dresang
Yes, it is. And it's also important to care for yourself, and we'll have stories about that in this episode.
Kim Shine
Oh, my gosh. When we talk about self-care, that is definitely a theme of 2026 for me. Okay?
Joel Dresang
Yeah, and it's the whole thing of, you know, when you're flying with somebody and the masks come down—
Kim Shine
Put yourself on first, okay? [laughs]
Joel Dresang
Yes, exactly. Yes. Our first caring story in this episode comes from Linda Nwumeh, who recalls her childhood quest to care for a pet. Here's Linda.
Linda Nwumeh
Okay. So, I've always loved pets. Growing up, my parents would not let me get any of the pets that I wanted. So, no cats, no dogs, nothing like that. So, naturally, me and my sister started to do a lot of YouTube research, right? As kids do. So, we wanted to basically make sure that whatever worries our parents had about us getting pets, they wouldn't be able to come up with a counterargument, right? So, we're like, "Okay, it has to take up a little bit of space. It's got to be quiet. It's got to be fun. It's got to be cuddly." So naturally, we came up with the idea of getting pet rats.
[laughter]
So, we looked everything up on YouTube. We're like, "Okay, we've got to be able to, like, you know, do a, kind of like DIY. It can't cost that much money." So, we looked up, like, how to build the, the cages and everything. Like, the cheapest ways to construct everything. And we basically came up with this, like, you know, proposal for our parents. Like, how are we going to get these rats, right?
Thankfully, there was a really small pet store near our house. And this should have been, like, a red flag, right? It was this tiny pet store, and it was just, like, really tucked off in the corner. You wouldn't even know it was there, right? And so, we went in there one day, and we saw, like, "Wow, these pet rats, they're, like, 45 cents. What a steal!"
[laughter]
You know, so we're like, "Okay, there's no excuse. We need to pick them up, right?" So, we picked up these, you know, like—and it was weird because, like, we went to go get these rats, we probably had, like, I don't know, $2 and got change back, right? And then, um, [laughs] like, we, we bought them, and then the store owner was kind of looking at us strangely because they also sold, like, pythons. And we didn't make the connection, though.
[laughter]
We were like, "Okay." Like, we just got these— [laughs] we just picked up these rats, and we were, like, the happiest people in the world. Like, we were like—we had our little box, and we just took them home, you know? And then we, we got our little DIY supplies. Like, we had this, um, this big plastic container. We—I don't even know where we got this stuff from. Just, like, these grates we put on top of it, and, like, we, we just kind of, like, cobbled this thing together, and we put the rats in there.
And our parents were like, "Mm-hmm." You know, I guess their prop—our proposal was too—it was too clean, right? They couldn't really, like, "Okay, you got them, right?" So—but we should have known. Those rats, they weren't looking quite right. Honestly, they weren't. [laughter] But, but I mean, we found, later on, so we put everything together. You know, they were in the cage, and my sister was like, "Okay, you know, they're here. They look so nice. So cuddly. We're—" You know, went to put her hand in the cage. That rat bit her fingers so badly, like—
Audience
Noooo.
Linda Nwumeh
Oh, my goodness. Yeah, and—but, you know, we weren't deterred. I was like, "That's okay. You know, of course it's been—of course it's nervous, right?" But, of course, I mean, this is the first day, what did you expect? Um, so yeah, over the course of a few days, we tried everything we could to make the cats—the rats feel more comfortable. But unfortunately, around that two-to-three-day mark, we went and looked in the cage that next morning, it was—neither of them were there, they were gone.
[laughter]
The rats were gone, right? Um, and, yeah, we found them about—Gosh, I think we found them maybe like a day and a half later. They both just had crawled off into some corner of our basement, and they were, they were dead. They had some disease, clearly. And yeah, I mean, it's, it's a pretty sad story, actually. The—[laughter] But, um, yeah, I guess the moral of the story is like, if, if you go to a pet store, the rats are 45 cents, don't buy them. [laughter] Yeah, that's it.
[applause]
Joel Dresang
That was Linda Nwumeh, who shared her story at a 2024 Ex Fabula's StorySlam with the theme Lost. That was quite an adventure.
Kim Shine
Yeah, man. [laughter]
Now, many of us have been influenced by caring that we received from educators, and our next story comes from Isaiah Raziel Furquan, who as a young teacher, learned about trying to care for a student who didn't want to be taught. Here's Isaiah.
Isaiah Raziel Furquan: For the majority of my life, I have been working in some type of form of public speaking or public engagement. Ever since I was a very, very small child, my mom was always engaged in the community, always working to further, uh, wherever she is, and she always taught us that as long as you knew how to read, you can teach yourself anything, you can move and do anything and learn anything, and be whoever you wanna be.
Because of that, I've been in many, many positions to speak, talk, and teach youth, and most recently, I've been working with a nonprofit organization called Still Waters Collective in the city of Milwaukee over the past maybe eight or so years. And during that time, I was given the opportunity to teach a lot of youth from middle school to high school about not only writing poetry and creating art but learning that you are an individual and learning about what that means and what it means to be an individual, a part of the larger groups.
We're all a part of bigger groups, whether we notice it or not, whether it comes from race or the fandoms that you're in because of the TV shows that you watch, or the books that you like to read, or just the places that you like to gather. And that is something that I try to impart with all my students.
Now, I have a very specific student I would like to talk about today. A couple years ago, I was working at a middle school here in the city called Lincoln. I was going there for about eight weeks.
Normally, these residencies lasted between four and eight weeks. I would go into different schools, and I would be there for about an hour with each class. Sometimes I'd be there with one class, sometimes I'd be there to teach three different classes, but I only get the chance to interact with these students for 60 minutes a week for a couple of weeks, and then I am expecting them to come back and know the things that I taught them last week and keep paying attention and learning about it.
As many people know, being people who were in classrooms at one time, or maybe you've taught in a classroom, the attention span of the whole class is very, very split up, right? If we split it up, we have about 50% of the students totally engaged, totally working, listening to every word I have to say, then we have another 20% of the students who are kind of following along, but also are whispering over here, talking to this person, this and that.
Then we have the—another 15% are students that have actively decided that they would not like to participate today, which is fine, and being an educator, you have to learn that sometimes you can't give all your energy to the students that have, uh, opted to not participate because then you can't teach the whole lesson to everyone else. So, I always give them the option to come back in whenever they like to, but I have to keep teaching the lesson, right?
Then we always have that very small percentage of students who not only don't want to do what's happening here, but they don't want it to be easy for everybody else to do what's happening here, right? So, this student's name was DeAndre. DeAndre, as most of these students are, is a very charismatic character, right? He says something, everybody's ears in the class start bending that way. And a lot of times, it is disruptive, funny, sometimes intelligent, but not really on task, right?
So, for about the first three or four weeks, I come in every day to the classroom, ready to teach, but in the back of my mind, I'm like, "DeAndre's gonna be here, just gotta be ready for this, just gotta be ready to deal with this and make sure that this doesn't become a problem for everyone here." I kept working that way and kept working that way, but eventually it got to the point where I was coming to the classroom, and I had this thought where I'm like, "Ah, I hope he's not here. I hope he's not here today. Oh, I hope he's not here today. He's gonna make this hard. This is gonna be harder than last time."
But eventually, I had to really take a moment, really take a second to think about how I was becoming, the way I was starting to feel, and realize that it isn't fair. It isn't fair for me to feel like, "Oh, this child is gonna be here when I'm coming in." It isn't fair for me to have this idea when I have not yet created the space, maybe, that he needs to grow and participate.
So, I had to check myself and take the time to, on our following week, take five, ten minutes after class to talk to DeAndre. And from that, I was able to speak with him and let him know where I was coming from as an educator, why I needed us to pay attention, and why I thought this stuff was important for him. All right? He said he got it. I said, "Okay." And we moved on. And honestly, he got a little better, but not a lot changed in those next few weeks, right?
Fast forward three, four years. I'm walking into a high school now, and I see DeAndre. And I said, "Hey, DeAndre, what's going on? How's it going?" He catches up with me, and he starts telling me about how he really felt unseen in middle school. He really felt like nobody was giving him, uh, attention, care, like he wasn't able to be himself. And after our conversation, he said that he was able to not only feel like he could be himself around others, but using poetry, he found a way to have his voice heard in a positive manner, in a way to change the way that he thinks about the world and how the world has to see him.
So, to wrap it all up in conclusion, I had to, which we sometimes have to do, I had to take a moment and take some action against myself to correct a mentality that I was subconsciously creating because it was becoming an issue not only for myself but for the people I impact in the world. So, thank you.
[applause]
Kim Shine
All right. Now, Isaiah spoke at a 2020 Ex Fabula outreach event at the Martin Luther King branch of the Milwaukee Public Library. And we have an update from Isaiah, too—
Joel Dresang
Great.
Kim Shine
—cause we always love updates.
Joel Dresang
Yeah, I love that.
Kim Shine
As far as it goes, he's working on a book. Title is coming soon, still writing and sharing stories and poetry, and open to bringing them where needed.
So, Joel, how about we do some UltraShorts?
Joel Dresang
Yes, let's. Tell us what those are.
Kim Shine
UltraShorts are short stories that, if you are not participating in the theme or in the show, then you can get your story told by the host on stage.
Joel Dresang
Yes. And they're real brief and, uh, that's why we call them UltraShorts.
Kim Shine
That's right.
Joel Dresang
And I've got one right here that I selected, especially for you. [laughter] It's from Disgruntled Scorpio: “As a Scorpio, I don't understand why we get a bad rap. We are caring, loving, generous, and fine. Justice for Scorpios.”
Kim Shine
You know—
Joel Dresang
Because you're a Scorpio, right?
Kim Shine
I am!
Joel Dresang
Yes.
Kim Shine
I will give that all the love and praise and care [laughter] and applause all the things, because that is so true. We do get a bad rap, but we're, we're awesome.
Joel Dresang
Well, also disgruntled, though, that's how that whole thing started.
Kim Shine
Because, don't, don't—people just want to get on our nerves! [laughter] We got a lot of nerves. We're very nice. We're very nice.
All right. So, this one here is from Crystal. Crystal says, "I create jewelry and other gifts for people. I care about a piece of myself that others can hold onto."
Joel Dresang
Here's an UltraShort from Anonymous: "I keep saying I need more physical activity for my mental health, but life gets busy. But last week, I got creative and hiked on rocks along the lake while my daughter ran along the path. Creative plus refreshing."
Kim Shine: That definitely sounds like it. Ooh, I can't wait till the weather gets really, really, really warm so we can do that all the time.
All right. So, this is from Rebecca: "Parenting two children with mental illness is exhausting. I'm a 24-hour lifeguard for my child. I also struggle with mental illness. So, I decided to help myself with self-care activities. I make time for gardening, camping, sewing, swimming, volunteering. I hope I am an example for my children."
Joel Dresang
Yes. Besides teachers, medical professionals require a special capacity for caring. As a medical student, Weston Maier had his career path influenced by an unexpected moment of caring. He shared his story at an Ex Fabula StorySlam in 2017. Here's Weston.
[applause]
Weston Maier
The first two years of medical school are, uh, you know, like college plus. It's more lectures, more tests, more books. It's everything that an insufferable Type A perfectionist is already used to. But at the beginning of your, your third year of medical school, you get thrown into a hospital, and it is sink or swim. It's fake it till you make it. And, uh, it is, it is a frightening time, and it is a magical time because that is when you find out what you really wanna do as a doctor.
Everyone comes into medical school saying, "I'm going to be a cardiologist, I'm gonna be a neurologist," but it's not until you get into your third and fourth years, your rotations, and you see the reality of it, and that's what sells it to you. So many people do a complete 180 once they really see what the life is like. So, it's a very formative time. But one of the ways in that it's most formative is not necessarily figuring out what you wanna do but figuring out what you don't wanna do. And I knew from the start that I didn't wanna do surgery. But you have to take a surgery rotation. So, I signed up for it first. My very first rotation.
Day one, I'm in the operating room. A little frightening. And, uh, it was terrifying. It was, it was eight weeks of constant terror. [laughs] But there was, uh, I was fortunate enough that I ended up working my surgery rotation at the Children's Hospital of Wisconsin. And there's something magical working about—with working about kids. And, uh, you know, I still didn't like the surgery, but it was, it was cool enough because it was all novel, everything's new. And the kids are just so cute, right?
And so, one day I'm working my very first overnight shift. I'm going to be there until, you know, like 11:00 the next morning. I'm overnight with my resident, and in the middle of the night, in comes this darling seven-year-old girl, and she is like doubled over in pain. And she is just not feeling well. So, my resident and I, we get called down to the emergency room to see her, to evaluate her for, maybe it's appendicitis, right? So, we go down and, you know, we talk to her, we get the history, right? And we call up, you know, our attending, who is a woman about half my size—and terrifies me to this day—and is incredibly smart. And we call her down, we say, "You know," you know, we give her the story, and we're like, "We don't think it's appendicitis."
And she says, "Whoa, whoa, whoa, wait. She comes in with pain here, she's not eating, she's throwing up, she has a fever, and her white blood cell count is elevated, and you're telling me she doesn't have appendicitis?" And then my resident and I kind of look at each other and, like, "Well, when you put it that way."
[laughter]
So, sheepishly, we end up taking her to the emergency—to the operating room that night. And you'll be happy to know that they don't let the medical students operate.
[laughter]
But I did get to pilot the laparoscopic camera used, you know, to see inside for the laparoscopic surgeries. And so, I got to, you know, take this girl's history in the emergency room, I, you know, contributed, I like to think, to the surgery. I got to take pictures that I showed her later. I stole an EKG from a very reluctant emergency room physician when she passed out later, and I wanted to make sure her heart was okay.
And two days later, I'm working during the day, and she's gonna go home. She had her surgery, she went—it went great. She is 100% better. And so, I go into the room to tell her the good news, like, "You can go home now."
And, this—this little girl who was, like, been healthy her entire life, and then just went through, like, probably the most traumatic two days of like pain and fear and surgery, she comes up to me, hugs me around the legs, looks up with these like big, deer eyes, and then turns back to her parents and said, "Can't we stay one more day?" [laughter] That's when I decided on pediatrics. Thanks.
[applause]
Joel Dresang
That was Weston Maier, and we've got an update from him, too. So, since he told that story, he completed his pediatrics residency in Buffalo, New York, and he's now in his final year of fellowship training for sub-specialization into pediatric infectious disease at UCLA in Los Angeles. His wife, Victoria, is a neonatologist, and they have an infant son of their own now, and that son is almost a year old. And Weston says, "I promise the audience, I am much more confident and competent in my medical ability than I was back when I told that story."
Kim Shine
That's awesome. But you guys, you and your wife—
Joel Dresang
He sounded fine. Yes.
Kim Shine
You should be proud. You guys are helping change the world.
Joel Dresang
Oh, my goodness. Yes.
Kim Shine
Okay, you're making sure that care and self-care is happening.
Joel Dresang
Way to go.
Kim Shine So thank you.
Our final story in this episode is from Mary Krawczyk. Now, after decades as a caregiver, as a mother, as a teacher of students with special needs, Mary reflects on the importance of caring for herself. Here's Mary.
[applause]
Mary Krawczyk: So, I guess my small win is really just being here tonight. I love telling stories. I love writing. I love making little videos and kind of just talking about things in life. But I don't do that enough. And, back in 2018, I had done the Ex Fabula Fellowship, which that year, I think, was about fair housing, and it was thematic, and it was really an amazing experience. And it's something that I had wanted to stick with, with storytelling and being involved with Ex Fabula, but life came along, and that's where, like, there's this bigger piece, which is returning to ourselves.
You know, I'm a 56-year-old woman. I spent most of my life raising my three children and being a teacher. I was always taking care of other people, and now it's like, "Is it time for me to take care of myself?" And it is, and that is not just a small win, but a huge win.
But I'm thinking of, like, a couple of years ago, I was having a therapeutic massage, and the practitioner was sort of working, doing some body work, and he's like, "Okay, Mary, but—" you know, I was telling him about my life, and I was still teaching at the time, and my most recent teaching experience was um, special—as a special education teacher with first and second graders with pretty sig—
[applause]
—thank you. Thank you. With pretty significant, and com—they had complex needs, right? And—but anyway, this practitioner said to me, "But who's holding you up, Mary?" And I just started sobbing, right? Like, because who is holding Mary up? But kind of to that bigger theme of, you know, taking care of other people.
I did, you know, I did leave the classroom of June—in June of 2022, after the pandemic, and just everything, like trying to teach non-verbal children on Zoom, right? Like, not possible. So, it, it just kind of broke me. And at the same time, my own children were really like growing up and leaving the nest, and this whole concept of returning to myself has really been a strong theme.
And, last Friday, I went to this Creative Milwaukee Mornings, I don't know if you've heard of those events or Creative Mornings Milwaukee, amazing event. There was a speaker. She was an illustrator, and her whole talk was amazing, but when she—at the end, I was almost moved. I was moved to tears. She said, "You know, if I don't illustrate again after today, I'm proud of myself. I'm proud of what I've done."
And I thought about myself, yes, thinking of my accomplishments of being a special education teacher and, you know, raising my three children, but also proud of myself for the things I do every day, for getting up and going to work, for trying to be—put kindness and love into the world, for telling stories, for being vulnerable.
And so, I made a little video, kind of a little story on my TikTok. Yes, I have a TikTok. I know, I was like, "You're too old for TikTok, but I have it. So, I made this little story about just going on a run, and after the run, and I'm all sweaty and gross and, you know, I'm like making this video about I'm proud of myself. And so, I think, again, I'm proud of myself. You all be proud of you. Be proud of the things that you do each day to make yourself and the world a better place. That's it.
[applause]
Kim Shine
And Mary Krawczyk shared that story at a 2025 Ex Fabula Slam with the theme Small Wins. We've got an update from Mary, too.
Joel Dresang
Great!
Kim Shine
She says, "One relevant update is that I took a short story writing class at the university where I worked during the fall semester. That was a joyful experience that relates to my intention of caring for and returning to myself."
Joel Dresang
Hey, Kim, how about some more UltraShorts?
Kim Shine
I would love to. What you got?
Joel Dresang
Here's one from Anonymous: "I learned to take care of older people when I was young. I enjoyed it so much that I became a certified nursing assistant."
Kim Shine
Oh, very nice.
Joel Dresang
That's nice.
Kim Shine
This next one, the person says, "Many times I feel exhausted, empty, with nothing to give. But when I see sad people at the supermarket or at the doctor's office waiting rooms, I just look them in the eyes and smile at them." That's kind.
Joel Dresang
That is. Here's an UltraShort from Anonymous: "Saving the planet is a tall order, and I'm not really doing it. But probably the most generous thing I've ever done was to live with and take care of my mother for two and a half years when she had Alzheimer's. I helped save one human being's quality of life, and I think that mattered. In fact, I know it did."
Kim Shine
Nice.
Joel Dresang
Thank you for that.
Kim Shine
Mm-hmm. This one is from Anonymous. "After a breakup, I learned to take care of myself. I've been going to a therapist, and I've been doing activities that make me happy. I've been painting and reading, and this makes me happy."
Joel Dresang
Well, that's all the time we have for this episode of Real Stories MKE, but there are more stories where these came from. Ex Fabula has been around since 2009, and there are plenty more audio stories available at exfabula.org/radio.
Kim Shine
Mm-hmm. And there's more storytelling on the way. The Ex Fabula website lists upcoming workshops and slams, so make sure you check it out and get involved and share some of your stories, whether it's on stage or, you know, it's the little bitty shorts that Joel likes to call. [laughter] You can keep up with Ex Fabula on Facebook and Instagram, and you can also keep up with Real Stories MKE wherever you get your podcasts.
Joel Dresang
And thanks to everyone who makes this program possible, including Ex Fabula's staff, the storytellers, of course, producer Jasmine Gonzalez, and audio engineer Sam Woods. Thanks, as well, to funders of Ex Fabula programs, including Heart of Canal Street, Bader Philanthropies Inc, the George F. Moss Foundation, Wisconsin Public Radio, and Ex Fabula members.
Kim Shine
Yeah. And this is our last episode of this season. So, this is our final sign-off. And I want you guys to make sure that, if we have another season, that you come back and you listen and you tell more stories.
Joel Dresang
Keep listening, you'll hear more. You'll hear more.
Kim Shine
Yes. And keep telling them so we can choose from them, and we can put them in more episodes. [laughter] For Real Stories MKE, y'all, I am Kim Shine.
Joel Dresang
And I'm Joel Dresang. Remember, everyone has stories worth sharing. Think of telling yours.
